Meet my girl Steph! Steph and I, along with Natasha (who you may have also read about), met while working at Quetico Park in Northern Ontario after the summer of grade 11. Steph is this super bubbly, friendly, smart, adventurous, no BS kind of lady. She's someone I can always turn to for honest advice without any sugar coat. Don't get me wrong though, she's also the sweetest bean. I've been lucky enough to both live and travel with her. She's really really good at playing with my hair. She also gave me my first real experience with Pad Thai and Glass Noodle Salad for which I am forever grateful. She has given me copious amounts of book and podcast recommendations. She comes from a wonderful family who have been gracious hosts to me multiple times. It's hard to believe the last time I saw her was two whole years ago saying farewell at Indira Gandhi Airport in Delhi. I absolutely love hearing about all of her worldly adventures and seeing what she has been up to. She's a forever kind of friend and I miss her soso much and I'm so excited for you to read all about her :)
Where are you from and where are you now?
I am from Toronto, Ontario and I'm writing this from Alaska! More specifically, in Denali National Park on a larger road trip of Alaska and Yukon.
What goals are you working towards and what keeps you motivated? Right now I'm trying to find some more normalcy and permanence to my life. I have been tree planting for 8 years and travelling in between, and while it's been wonderful it's been a lot of moving around and does not lend itself to any sort of long term plans. So I'm just trying to figure out what I want to do and where I want to live, for a little while at least. What does confidence mean to you? I think confidence is being able to lead the life you want no matter what. Confidence is making the best decisions for yourself no matter what other people are telling you to do or doing themselves. Once you're happy with your life everything else, including confidence in smaller aspects of your life, will come naturally. Where does your confidence come from? My confidence comes from my parents. They are incredibly supportive of my wild life and have always told me I could do whatever I wanted. Still to this day whenever I'm saying bye to my dad on the phone, he says: "I love you and I'm proud of you" no matter where I am or what I'm doing. Ever since I was little my mom would tell me to always remember how much she loves me whenever I'm upset or worried. It seems like small things but knowing that I always have them for support is huge. They are also such amazing examples for me to have had growing up. When I was young I didn't realize how smart they were about every little decision. But now I see how they created this incredible life for themselves that they can fully enjoy in their retirement. They also love each so much and are still sometimes like love sick teenagers haha. Having a strong example of real love in my life has contributed to my confidence as well. Knowing from a young age that that relationship is possible is an incredible gift. My mom is also one of the strongest women i can imagine in every aspect of her life, so having an amazing female role model like my mama has made me really comfortable and confident as a woman. I think I've caused them a fair bit of worry over the years when I've been gone for long periods of time but they have never once tried to stop me from doing whatever i was I after. What do you love about yourself?
a) Mentally? I'm really curious and adventurous and it's led me to incredible places and incredible people.
b) Physically? I like that I'm tall! I have a pretty athletic physique and I've always played loads of sports but I'm really grateful that I'm naturally healthy and strong.
c) Emotionally? I'm generally a really happy person and I try to stay positive about everything. I think complaining can be toxic to yourself and everyone around you so I try to avoid It, which lends itself to a pretty happy life. What is one of your greatest accomplishments? I got really into hiking last year when I was in South America and although I've always been physically active and spent a lot of time outdoors, climbing big peaks in high altitude was a whole new challenge. After three months I decided to attempt Huayna Potosi at 6088 meters and I made to the top which was the hardest thing I've ever done but also one of the most amazing! There is nothing as satisfying as being on the top of a huge mountain that your body carried you to. Do you find you compare yourself to others often? Yea totally! I think everyone does, and I don't think that has to be a bad thing. There are so many amazing people to learn from and comparing yourself and your situation to others can be a great way to learn and improve. Of course if your comparisons come from a place of envy or critique it's a bad thing, but I find that through comparison you can discover a lot of new things which can be wonderful. What is something in your life that you have had to overcome, or that you are working to overcome? I broke my back about 4 years ago and that was a huge blow to my confidence and mental state. I'd never had a serious injury or illness before that and it definitely made me take a step back and realize how quickly our lives can be turned upside down. While it was hard physically to overcome and took months of hospital visits and physical therapy and basically doing nothing for myself, it was much harder mentally to get over. I was angry and depressed and in denial and feeling emotions I didn't know what to do with and it took a really long time to get back to feeling like myself. I went from being extremely independent to moving back into my parents house and having them do absolutely everything for me. I couldn't leave the house alone, I couldn't shower, I couldn't work, I couldn't have the future I'd planned for myself. My parents and my friends were endless sources of support and especially patience even when I would push them away and be a huge bitch and I'll forever be grateful for that. What always makes you feel better? Chocolate and reading. Pizza. Is there anything about yourself- mentally, physically, or emotionally that you would like to improve? I over think and over analyze things to the extreme sometimes. I can take a small comment and blow it up to something huge in my mind. I'd like to be able to take things in stride and be a bit more resilient when it comes to criticism. What is one of your insecurities? Well I'm a bit of a perfectionist with some things and I don't always love it when I don't know certain things or get things wrong haha. I sometimes get insecure in new situations when I feel like I should know what to do but I really don't.
How do you deal with jealousy?
Hmm I try not to get too jealous about most things, but when I notice a feeling of jealousy I try to think about what exactly it is that I'm envious of and why. If it's something that would make me happy and something I really want to do I try to go after it! If it's something more superficial I try to just let it go.
Do you feel pressured by societal norms for your life to turn out a certain way?
Yes and no. I mean it's pretty impossible to ignore societal norms and I certainly question where I am in life at times but I think that's a good thing. If nothing else it makes me realize I'm much happier doing what I'm doing than a lot of people I know who are living a more conventional life. I don't really feel pressured to do anything different but I'm aware that I wouldn't fit into most societal norms.
Who has helped shape who you are?
My parents are an obvious one and I think less obviously would be my older brother. He and I are extremely different and our lives seem to be continually heading in opposite directions but we're still extremely close. When I was young I wanted to do everything he did; he played hockey, I played hockey; he went to camp, I went to camp etc. The people I met tree planting, especially in my first few years have definitely shaped who I am. I started planting after my first year of university and everyone else was older and travelling and it was all I wanted to do. It was always so bittersweet heading back to school in September while my friends were flying or driving around the world. As soon as I graduated I started travelling and I haven't stopped since.
What is the most important part of a romantic relationship?
Communication. It's so easy to misunderstand or be misunderstood which can lead to a fight or argument over nothing at all. Sometimes people just need to talk things out and have someone really listen to them. On the flip side, it's also so important to realize that sometimes people need to be left alone and to say nothing at all.
What are three things you are grateful for today?
1) being able to see Canada's north
2) visiting my friends and family in Toronto in a month who I haven't seen in 6 months
3) having friends all over BC that I can see along my way south!
What book should I read and why?
I love giving people (and especially you!) book recommendations! Although I tend to be kind of long winded with them...
I recently read Into Thin Air and really enjoyed it. It's a true story, outdoor adventure (same author as into the wild) and will either get you in the mood to start climbing or stay away from it forever.
I also loved the MaddAddam trilogy by Margaret Atwood. The first book is called Oryx and Crake and is amazing.
Where are you from and where are you now?
I am from Toronto, Ontario and I'm writing this from Alaska! More specifically, in Denali National Park on a larger road trip of Alaska and Yukon.
What goals are you working towards and what keeps you motivated? Right now I'm trying to find some more normalcy and permanence to my life. I have been tree planting for 8 years and travelling in between, and while it's been wonderful it's been a lot of moving around and does not lend itself to any sort of long term plans. So I'm just trying to figure out what I want to do and where I want to live, for a little while at least. What does confidence mean to you? I think confidence is being able to lead the life you want no matter what. Confidence is making the best decisions for yourself no matter what other people are telling you to do or doing themselves. Once you're happy with your life everything else, including confidence in smaller aspects of your life, will come naturally. Where does your confidence come from? My confidence comes from my parents. They are incredibly supportive of my wild life and have always told me I could do whatever I wanted. Still to this day whenever I'm saying bye to my dad on the phone, he says: "I love you and I'm proud of you" no matter where I am or what I'm doing. Ever since I was little my mom would tell me to always remember how much she loves me whenever I'm upset or worried. It seems like small things but knowing that I always have them for support is huge. They are also such amazing examples for me to have had growing up. When I was young I didn't realize how smart they were about every little decision. But now I see how they created this incredible life for themselves that they can fully enjoy in their retirement. They also love each so much and are still sometimes like love sick teenagers haha. Having a strong example of real love in my life has contributed to my confidence as well. Knowing from a young age that that relationship is possible is an incredible gift. My mom is also one of the strongest women i can imagine in every aspect of her life, so having an amazing female role model like my mama has made me really comfortable and confident as a woman. I think I've caused them a fair bit of worry over the years when I've been gone for long periods of time but they have never once tried to stop me from doing whatever i was I after. What do you love about yourself?
a) Mentally? I'm really curious and adventurous and it's led me to incredible places and incredible people.
b) Physically? I like that I'm tall! I have a pretty athletic physique and I've always played loads of sports but I'm really grateful that I'm naturally healthy and strong.
c) Emotionally? I'm generally a really happy person and I try to stay positive about everything. I think complaining can be toxic to yourself and everyone around you so I try to avoid It, which lends itself to a pretty happy life. What is one of your greatest accomplishments? I got really into hiking last year when I was in South America and although I've always been physically active and spent a lot of time outdoors, climbing big peaks in high altitude was a whole new challenge. After three months I decided to attempt Huayna Potosi at 6088 meters and I made to the top which was the hardest thing I've ever done but also one of the most amazing! There is nothing as satisfying as being on the top of a huge mountain that your body carried you to. Do you find you compare yourself to others often? Yea totally! I think everyone does, and I don't think that has to be a bad thing. There are so many amazing people to learn from and comparing yourself and your situation to others can be a great way to learn and improve. Of course if your comparisons come from a place of envy or critique it's a bad thing, but I find that through comparison you can discover a lot of new things which can be wonderful. What is something in your life that you have had to overcome, or that you are working to overcome? I broke my back about 4 years ago and that was a huge blow to my confidence and mental state. I'd never had a serious injury or illness before that and it definitely made me take a step back and realize how quickly our lives can be turned upside down. While it was hard physically to overcome and took months of hospital visits and physical therapy and basically doing nothing for myself, it was much harder mentally to get over. I was angry and depressed and in denial and feeling emotions I didn't know what to do with and it took a really long time to get back to feeling like myself. I went from being extremely independent to moving back into my parents house and having them do absolutely everything for me. I couldn't leave the house alone, I couldn't shower, I couldn't work, I couldn't have the future I'd planned for myself. My parents and my friends were endless sources of support and especially patience even when I would push them away and be a huge bitch and I'll forever be grateful for that. What always makes you feel better? Chocolate and reading. Pizza. Is there anything about yourself- mentally, physically, or emotionally that you would like to improve? I over think and over analyze things to the extreme sometimes. I can take a small comment and blow it up to something huge in my mind. I'd like to be able to take things in stride and be a bit more resilient when it comes to criticism. What is one of your insecurities? Well I'm a bit of a perfectionist with some things and I don't always love it when I don't know certain things or get things wrong haha. I sometimes get insecure in new situations when I feel like I should know what to do but I really don't.
